Post Grad Blues

I am officially a college graduate! Finished my last ever finals a few weeks back and I finally got my diploma in the mail! It feels so surreal to be done with school, for now at least. Going to school is all I know since I’ve been in the education system basically since I can talk. It feels weird to not be worrying about my next exam and assignment. Having a college degree has been the biggest goal in my life, whats my goal now? Obviously, it’s to get a job in a career and industry I want but I’m halfway done with that goal, so now what?

I’m always looking for the next big thing, which in some cases is great because it means I’m constantly growing and changing. But, it gives me so much anxiety and makes me second guess myself. I know what I want to do, I guess it’s the getting there that makes me worry. Like how will I know if what I am doing now is helpful in my career later on? And this is where you say, “you won’t know till the time comes Cate, calm down!” But I can’t!

I don’t mean to toot my own horn (I do), but I finished college before I turned 21, got a job within a week of officially finishing school and I know that’ss amazing but I just feel that there’s something else I can be doing to be a better candidate and overall person. I’m scared of being still because I know starting up again is going to be incredibly difficult. I don’t want to see myself in a rut and I don’t want to be one of those people who are just content with what is. It’s just not me.

I’m calling this my 1/5 life crisis. What in the world is Cate going to do next? Hopefully get a dog but that’s not happening anytime soon, thanks dad…

All the love.

After College Thoughts

Technically, I’m still in school. But I’m finishing up my degree with two online classes back home in the Bay Area. I’ve been home for two months now and I have honestly never been so stressed.

These past two months have been spent sending cover letter after cover letter to various positions and internships. I’ve applied to almost everything I am qualified for: receptionist, secretary, personal assistant positions, entry-level jobs in marketing, advertisement and public relations. Positions I would love to work as with companies I would love to work with. I’ve received phone calls, emails and have conducted interviews with various positions but it seems like I’m never going to get where I want to be.

Throughout college, I was so confident in myself and how much I have done to further my candidacy with my dream position. But to be truthful, I have never felt so down on myself. Everything you do in college is to fortify your resume and for me, not hearing anything back and being denied so many times has made me second guess myself. Did I go to the right college? Should I have majored in something else? Maybe I should have gotten an extra internship in this semester, I had the time.

Nothing annoys me more than the overly optimistic. Everyone tells me that getting to my dream position is going to take a while, but how long? I’m so scared of being a failure and not getting to my goal that at this rate I’m worried I’m never going to get there. Two internships under my belt, with a few years of related work to marketing, for being 20 and barely out of college, I have always thought my resume was pretty full. But now I’m wondering what else I can do to get me into the industry I want. I know I’m young and new to this job game but I can’t help but stress out when I see my peers already starting their lives.

 

All the love.